God’s Gifts Should Come With Gift Receipts

There have been many things I’ve seen in the past month or two that made me think, “I should write about that,” but I knew it would just take one really provocative headline to piss me off enough to help me break this silence and get back to blogging. Well people of the web – here’s the headline that pushed me over the edge:

“Rick  Santorum On Opposition To Abortion In Cases of Rape: ‘Make The Best Out Of A Bad Situation.'”

At first, I thought maybe this was a joke headline, a sort of Onion type piece. As soon as I started reading it I realized that I was sadly mistaken.

This man is in a position where he could possibly be the next President of the United States and he has the audacity to say that if a woman who was raped becomes pregnant as a result of that rape, that the fetus is a “gift from God.” Where the heck was god when she was getting raped? Where was he while this man was using and abusing her body against her will? This is a major issue I have with religion, God seems to never be held accountable for the tragic things that happen. Or if he is – he’s said to have some great plan and that our terrible tragedy is  just a part of the puzzle. Forgive me father, but I call bullshit. 

What does Rick Santorum not understand about the sick nature of being raped, then forced against your will to carry and give birth to your rapist’s offspring? He then says,

“it was still a gift from God, even if given in a broken way.”

Calling it “broken” is just a very nice way of saying raped.

Santorum also goes on to say that Obama’s support of women’s reproductive rights are “radical and extreme.” This came in response to the following statement released from President Obama on the 39th anniversary of Roe v. Wade:

“As we mark the 39th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, we must remember that this Supreme Court decision not only protects a woman’s health and reproductive freedom, but also affirms a broader principle: that government should not intrude on private family matters. I remain committed to protecting a woman’s right to choose and this fundamental constitutional right.

While this is a sensitive and often divisive issue — no matter what our views, we must stay united in our determination to prevent unintended pregnancies, support pregnant woman and mothers, reduce the need for abortion, encourage healthy relationships, and promote adoption. And as we remember this historic anniversary, we must also continue our efforts to ensure that our daughters have the same rights, freedoms, and opportunities as our sons to fulfill their dreams.”

Radical and Extreme? Really? What scares me the most is that people are actually buying this crap that Santorum is spewing (no pun intended).

Any woman who votes for Rick Santorum is directly voting against her own interests. How is it possible, that in 2012, there are still women out there who don’t realize this?

To any woman out there who votes for Rick Santorum, make sure you start carrying a condom on the same keychain as your pepper spray or your rape whistle. In the event that you are ever raped, it can’t hurt to ask your rapist to put it on. Oh wait, I forgot . . . Santorum doesn’t believe in contraception either. Damn, looks like you better just cross your fingers and hope that God doesn’t pick that moment to give you one of his wonderful gifts.

It’s getting to the point where I can’t even look at Rick Santorum without getting sick to my stomach. Ugh.

FYI Congressman West: us feminists have no interest in neutering your gender.

Sometimes I hear politicians say things, and I wonder how anyone can actually believe the shit that comes out of their mouths. I realize this video is from April, but I just saw it for the first time last weekend at the NOW National Conference and I had to respond.

In this video, Congressmen Allen West (R-FL) urges his female supporters to come together to tell the “Planned Parenthood Women” and “Code Pink Women who have been neutering American men”, that the Women for West are “not going to have their men become subservient”. He tells them that if they don’t come together to stop the Liberal Women that the “debt will continue to grow”. I swear I’m not making this up, have a look for yourself:

 

 

First, he makes these wild accusations, bashing “liberal women” for neutering men then turns right back around and calls on “his” women to “lock shields and come together to strengthen the men that will go in to the fight” for them. Wow – great game strategy Mr. West – what a way to enabling that “mean girl” mentality and pit women against other women.

And what is this 1910? Why are us women supposed to just sit around in our “Women for West” t-shirts, strengthening up the men so they can “go in to the fight” for us? Frankly, I don’t want you anywhere near my fight with that kind of attitude.

When I posted this link on facebook, a friend of mine, Hugo Schwyzer – an amazing feminst, women’s studies professor, and blogger (definitely check out his site) – commented this:

“How the hell do I still have my balls after all these years as a male feminist? **checks scrotum** **checks politics**”

We need more men like him in this world. He reassuringly said, “men like him are a dying breed, just taking a long time to go extinct.”

Obviously, Congressmen Allen West knows nothing about feminists and the feminist movement. The very last thing we want to do is to neuter men. I don’t want my men to be subservient, but I don’t want them to be dominant either. I want my men to stand with me – next to me – by my side as my equal.

I’ve got news for you Mr. West – real men don’t have to denigrate women in order to make themselves look better or to win elections.

Since When Are Pedophile Rape Jokes Funny?

I ref men’s league hockey games at a few of the nearby rinks. I’ve heard some pretty shitty stuff on the ice. Everything from insulting me because I’m a female official – to sexist jokes about players skills on the ice. Last night what I heard was, by far, the worst, most disturbing and disgusting thing I’ve ever heard – not just while officiating either. It pretty much takes the cake for one of the sickest comments ever.

This guy (who’s lucky that I don’t know his name and that he can only be identified by his jersey that read HPPB in bright pink letters. He told me it stood for Hot Pink Panda Bears) skates over to the bench in between plays. Behind their bench were two little girls, one maybe 6 the other about 10. The younger one was sleeping in the bleachers, wrapped up from head to toe in a blanket. I said to the guys on the bench, “Well, someone’s kids are out past their bedtime!” It was an 11:15pm game.

The guy in the HPPB jersey says, “Oh those are my kids.”

He was really young – like maybe 25 so I replied, “No they’re not – are they really?”

He says, “Yea, I have 6 kids.” I don’t believe him, and he offers to show me pictures.

Now I can tell he’s full of shit and making all this up cause him and his teammates are all starting to giggle like little boys. I jokingly said to him, “Haven’t you heard of birth control?” At this point, play was going the other direction so I had to skate away.

He waits till the next face-off and skates over to tell me this story. This is where it goes from funny to sick REAL fast.

He goes, “Let me tell you what happened. So, I took my 7 year old daughter to the doctor. Everything was great – the doctor said she was fine. And I asked him, ‘Hey doc, do you think I can get her some birth control?’ and the doctor said ‘What?! For you daughter? She’s only 7 years old, you mean to tell me she’s already sexually active?’ and I looked at the doctor and said, ‘No way, are you kidding? She just lays there . . . just like her mother does.'”

I had absolutely NO idea what to say to him. I think what came out of my mouth was something like, “Your fucking sick. I should give you a penalty just for telling that joke.” (Which was a totally lame response, but come on I was shocked.)

He actively sought me out, half way across the ice, to come tell me a sick joke about him having sex with his 7 year old daughter. He honestly thought I would think it was funny!

I do have to give the guys on his team credit though, the ones that heard him tell it all made remarks about how they thought it was sick. A few minutes later in the game my partner called a penalty on him and as I skated by him in the box I told him it was karma for telling sick pedophile rape jokes. Then I told him he needed to change the HPPB on his jersey to HPDB for douche-bag.

I guess maybe I’m less offended by sexist or racist jokes, because we hear them so much more often. And I guess I should be just as offended by those too. But what could possibly make ANYONE think a joke about having sex with your 7 year old daughter is even the slightest bit funny. I don’t understand that.

He told that joke to the wrong feminist . . .

Turning Women into Meat . . . Literally

I realize that this HUSTLER cover is really outdated (June 1978), but I think it’s important to talk about. This was the cover of a HUSTLER magazine form 32 years ago. Yet, I still feel like it’s relevant to how women are viewed in the gentleman’s magazines of today.

Yesterday started reading the book Pornland: How porn has hijacked our sexuality. So far I’m loving the book! I’ll be sure to post some updates about it!

Any thoughts on this image? 

Feminism Worth a Thousand Words

I found this to be very profound. Thought I’d share it . . .

When we Said we Wanted Equality, we Didn’t Mean This

I swear this is the real image from the Man Spanx home page!

 

My boyfriend and I were at a men’s dress clothing store today called The Shirt Box. While he was trying on clothes, I was browsing around the store and I couldn’t believe what I saw on one of the shelves. Mixed in with the bow ties, tie pins, and cuff links were . . . . SPANX FOR MEN!! I was shocked when I saw them.! I might have believed they were a product that sat on the shelf for a long time that men just laughed at, but As I was having this conversation with myself, trying to comprehend the tragic-ness of the situation, I realized that a man in the store was trying the man Spanx on!

The Spanx website features undershirts and underwear for men with the catch phrase,

“Expect more from your underwear!”

The website claims, “These physique-improving, game-changing undershirts feature powerful compression zones that comfortably transform the torso and chest! He’ll look sharper, stand taller and feel stronger in his clothes!” Another style claims, “These chest-firming, back-supporting shirts will narrow his waist line, flatten his stomach and leave him looking and feeling his best!” Because we all know your true self is never your best, right? This is the same bullshit that these companies have been feeding women for years!

We have been fighting the toxic body culture that we (mostly women) live in for years. We have been fighting for equal rights with men for so long. But, when we said we wanted equality, we didn’t mean we wanted men to hate their bodies as much as we do! How sad. There can’t be much hope for women if the toxic body-hate is spilling over to the male gender too.

From Seed magazine:

Every bit as unattainable as Barbie-doll proportions and the heroin chic look are the broad-shouldered, narrow-waisted, fat-free, and muscle-sheathed male physiques littering today’s media.

Men in advertising and media are no long hairy, sweaty men who don’t care what they look like. They are now shaved, buff, fat free dudes who put a lot of thought in to their appearance. I don’t have too much expertise on this subject, but I sense that this is creating some sort of conflict in the male world. Our culture is telling men to be “men,” but at the same time the media is teaching them to hate their bodies. I feel like these are two very conflicting messages.

Seed Magazine says:

Whether “real-body” discomfort in men is truly new or something that’s only now being noticed is impossible to say, but sociologists and psychologists say that images of hairless, sweatless, pseudo-perfect men are more common than ever before.

According to the National Eating Disorders Association, there are about 1 million men with serious eating disorders and tens of millions who have some form of eating disorders.

Again, this is sad. Not only do we have to worry about protecting our young girls from the body-hate culture, but now we also have to protect our boys.

Video For Those With Vaginas!

In light of the pending government shutdown over the proposed Planned Parenthood budget cuts, I thought I’d post this video. It is definitely worth the watch!

“They help women . . . period!”

Thanks to TheSecondCity Network for creating it!

Nascar > Planned Parenthood

Are you serious? I'd like to hear them justify this one.

Via The Campanil. “On February 18th, the US House of Representatives voted to withdraw federal funding for Planned Parenthood. The withdraw amount in total, if it passes in the Senate, will reduce the organization’s budget by $363 million dollars.

The measure is part of a larger bill to cut government spending — strangely, among the programs which did not receive cuts that day was NASCAR, the largest sanctioning body of stock car racing in the United States. Yes, really.

A bill proposed by Minnesota Democratic Representative Betty McCollum would have stopped the Army’s annual $7 million sponsorship of NASCAR, paid for by taxpayer dollars.  However, the Republican-controlled House voted overwhelmingly against it.

Apparently health services for low-income, uninsured women is less of a basic human right than high speed car races.

The Campanil Staff feels that cuts for Planned Parenthood in conjunction with the decision to continue to federally fund NASCAR is one of many examples showing the often mixed up priorities of our country’s government.  The billions of dollars spent on the continuation of the “War on Terror” while the nation’s schools suffer enormous budget slashes comes to mind pretty quickly.”

I think I might be sick. Read the article for yourself here.

My Uterus and I Have Something to Say

Every time I read another article about the proposed legislation against women’s rights, I get a sick feeling in my stomach. Yesterday, I almost had a total meltdown out of frustration and sadness.

I’m sick of hearing the same illogical arguments from anti-choice people. I’m sick of hearing politicians try to force their religion down my throat by means of eliminating my reproductive rights. I’m sick and tired of it and I can’t take it any more with out saying something.

First, I’d like to point out that there are only two ways to categorize your thoughts about abortion. You are either “pro-choice” or “anti-choice.” There’s no such thing as pro-life. Give me a break – everyone is pro-life! However, based one your beliefs (wether they be personal or religious) we all have different opinions about when life begins. Considering that there are studies professing all sorts of facts about this topic – it remains a very personal decision based on what you choose to believe. Hence the term, “pro-choice” because it should be left up to the woman, her partner, and her doctor to make a decision that is best for them and their beliefs.

Second, if I hear one more person call Planned Parenthood the “nations largest abortion provider,” I’m gonna lose it. According to the Guttmacher Institute there were approximatly 1.3 million abortions performed throughout the USA in 2009. Planned Parenthood performed approximatly 300,000 abortion in 2009. Lets to the math together: 300,000 divided by 1.3 million = 0.2307. This means that Planned Parenthood is responsible for 23% of the abortions performed annually in the USA. HELLO?! Thats less than a quarter! This means that there are a lot of abortions happening in places other than Planned Parenthood. However, they can get away with calling them the “largest abortion provider” because, as an organization, they provide more abortions than any other single organization. Basically, these politicians are doing what they do best: manipulating the truth for their benefit. Do the math for yourself. Don’t believe their manipulative lies about the statistics.

What does planned parenthood do to make their money each year? Well, for starters, in 2009 they’ve provided cancer screening and prevention for over 1.8 million women, including pap tests, HPV vaccinations, breast exams, and colposcopy procedures. They’ve provided STI/STD testing and treatment for almost 4 million men and women. And they’ve made contraception services accessible for over 4 million men and women. Total, Planned Parenthood has made reproductive health care possible for over 11 million men and women, who may not have had this benefit otherwise because 75% of their clients have incomes at or below 150% of the federal poverty level. (Example: According to the Health and Human Services, the federal poverty level for a single woman is $10,830 a year. This changes based on number of people in the family.)

Third, someone said to me the other day, “I don’t want my tax dollars paying for your abortion.” Planned Parenthood receives NO federal funding for abortions services.NONE! From Huffington Post,

“Although, Planned Parenthood receives zero federal dollars for abortion services and uses all government funding for preventative care, conservative rhetoric continues to portray the organization as a taxpayer-funded abortion factory.”

I couldn’t have said it better myself! For those of you who still think your tax dollars are paying for abortions, I’d like to introduce you to the Hyde Amendment. “Since 1976, the Hyde Amendment has excluded abortion from the comprehensive health care services provided to low-income people by the federal government through Medicaid.” The federal exception for funding for abortion exists in cases of rape, incest, or when a pregnant woman’s life is endangered by a physical disorder, illness or injury. As Kristen Schaal, sarcastically points out on the Jon Stewart show, federal funds paid for a mere 191 abortions in 2006, for cases of rape, incest or where the woman’s life was in danger. This works out to be two tenths of a penny (.2) per tax payer. (Any one who would like a refund come see me. I’ll even refund it with interest and make it an entire penny.)

Fourth, quit using the under cover videos and phone calls from Live Action as proof of anything that happens in Planned Parenthood. From Huff Post, “Despite the questionable legitimacy of the Live Action reports, conservative lawmakers continue to use them in their arguments for defunding Planned Parenthood.” They have proven that these videos were highly edited to distort the health workers statements. Again, manipulate the truth (did you expect anything less?). Quit using them as proof of anything.

Fifth, I seem to remember something about a separation of Church and State. Republicans and Tea Baggers are opposed to abortion for one specific reason: religion. The problem is, I don’t believe what you believe. I don’t believe in your god or your religion and last time I checked we live in a country where we have freedom of religion. Which, as a friend pointed out, also means freedom from religion. I would never tell anyone they were wrong for believing what they choose to about abortion based on their religion. Thats why it’s called PRO-CHOICE! Because it’s your choice. When having a discussion with someone the other day they said to me, “I am pro-life because I believe god knits each one of us in our mothers womb. Psalm 139: god knew us before he laid the foundation of this world. I will not keep that to myself.” I would never ever tell this man that he was wrong for believing that. That’s his religion of choice and if he is ever faced with an unwanted pregnancy, he will obviously choose not to end it. However – don’t you dare try to inflict your religious beliefs on me when it comes to my reproductive rights. He finished his letter by saying he would pray for me. Seriously dude, spare me. Please do not pray for me because I do not want your god or your religion anywhere near my uterus.

Seems to me that this new wave of anti-choice legislation is more about punishing and shaming women than it is about saving babies. Jon Stewart says,

“They want to cut everything from family care to prenatal care to child nutrition. It’s like the Republican Congress is saying, “You can’t prevent an unwanted child. You can’t get care if you do get pregnant, and you can’t get any help after the baby is born. But — for those two minutes when the skull is crowning your baby is the most precious thing on Earth.”

I’m hesitant to post these videos cause it’s sad to me that it’s so outrageous that it’s becoming a joke, but I think they’re worth watching. Check them out here and here. They are pretty funny and informative at the same time.

So, now, lets talk about the fucking hypocrisy that is happening here. They are de-funding Planned Parenthood as part of the budget-cuts, because they don’t want their tax dollars paying for abortions (which we’ve established already that they aren’t and haven’t since 1976 and that these are really a back door way to express their religious views). Cause where else could we get that money from? Well lets see – General Electric make 10.3 Billion dollars last year and paid (ready for this) NOTHING in taxes. And this is only one example of one company. And for everyone who says, “I don’t want my taxes paying to kill innocent babies.” I’ve got news for you – your taxes (and lots of them) pay to make bombs and fund our military which kills THOUSANDS of innocent people in the war. Moms and Dads, children and babies, even pregnant women. So again, that argument is null and void unless you plan on defunding our military too. OH – and lets talk about how much BIG money is involved in the health care industry. Planned Parenthood makes nothing compared to the big pharmaceutical companies, who may I remind you, pay very little taxes.

Here you have these CEO’s making millions of dollars each year and there are men and women who can’t afford have basic health care services at high-end doctors, who can use Planned Parenthood as an alternative for low-cost care that they can afford, but we are going to cut their funding and propose all this legislation to make it almost impossible for them to function, leaving these low-income men and mostly women with no affordable health care. Something is terribly wrong with this picture.

What pisses me off the most is that there are so many young women who either aren’t interested in these issues or don’t know anything about them. Well, it’s time to get involved! It’s time for every woman to realize that there are HUGE losses on the line right now. Your body is being legislated based on religious reasons, yet they aren’t allowed to say “uterus” on the house floor any more. Your reproductive rights are on the chopping block and you need to start standing up for them. Get involved. Learn about what’s going on and take a stand. Stop acting like it doesn’t effect you, because it does. I guarantee that someone you know has had an abortion and/or been a patient at a Planned Parenthood clinic.

So please, for all of us, if you love your body and you cherish it as your own, don’t let these politicians regulate it with their religious beliefs. Start speaking out and tell them to keep their god out of your uterus!

My Vagina is Perfect!

This post was inspired by an essay I wrote for a class after reading an article titled Vulvas with a Difference by Faith Wilding. I’ve always been slightly disgusted by the recent popularity of vaginal rejuvenation surgeries. In fact, I find the whole concept appalling.

I remember the exact day I learned my vagina was different. I was at one of those trashy, fluorescently lit, sex-shops with my boyfriend. We were looking at all the fun toys and at the end of an aisle we came to the fake vaginas. I asked my boyfriend, “Why do they make them look like that?”

“Like what?” he said.

“Like that,” I pointed to the plastic vulva lips, “all weird and stuff.”

He looked at me confused and said with a smile, “That’s what some vaginas look like.”

I was shocked! I thought to myself, “Wait . . . my vagina does not look like that.” This was the first time, in my entire life, that I felt a slight insecurity about my vagina. I realized that I had never actually seen anyone’s vagina other than my own.

There may be something we can learn from this. I didn’t know what other vaginas looked like, so I didn’t know what mine was “supposed” to look like. I’m not bombarded on an hourly basis with images of beautiful, skinny, blonde, vaginas. It’s the only part of my body that no one was shoving images of in my face telling me what it was “supposed” to look like. And as a result, I thought it was perfect. I’d heard about vaginal rejuvenation and pink dyes to make your vagina a more “preferable” color, but I always thought that was for old ladies who’d had kids or were just dealing with the inescapable effects of aging. I had no clue that my vagina wasn’t pink enough, or now maybe it’s too pink. Fortunately for me, I was at a place in my life where I could realize the absurdity of my new-found vaginal insecurity, and get over it fast. But what if I had been 16 and seen that fake vagina? I might have gone into my adolescent years with a crushing worry about the appearance of my most treasured body part.

In the article Vulvas With a Difference, Faith Wilding says, “The new vulvar and vaginal surgical technologies would be put to much better use in helping women seeking reconstruction and healing of sexual organs mutilated and damaged by Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) practices, than in making unnecessary “aesthetic” interventions on perfectly healthy women.” (3) I totally agree with her. It makes me so sad to think that there are women who are so unhappy with the appearance of their vagina that they’re resorting to surgery to “fix” it. We are fighting the gruesome and terrible practice of FGM, and yet there are women voluntarily submitting themselves to the same kind of practice. Just because an anesthetic is used, and you are given pain pills after doesn’t make it any different.

Here are some of the ridiculous products I found that are for “fixing” or making your vagina “better”. News flash – I like my vagina just the way it is. These are a few products we could do without. (I swear I didn’t make some of these up.)

Betty Beauty Pubic Hair Dye
Don’t like the color of your pubic hair? Don’t worry! You can dye it!

 

 

 

Alpha Betty Vagina Bling
This is not an area for glue and reinstones.

 

 

 

 

 

 

My New Pink Button
Not only do we have to shave our vagina’s, but now we hate to tell you, the soft sensitive skin underneath that hair . . . it’s definitely not pink enough.  So if your vagina is actually skin colored . . . you need to fix that.

 

 

 

Vaginal Scented Film Deodorant
Just in case your vagina actually smells like say . . . vagina . . . there’s a solution for that! Just use one of these little films and your vagina will instantly smell like baby power, fresh flowers, or get this – island breeze! FINALLY! I’ve always wanted a vagina that smelled like island breeze! Taking a note from the Vagina Monologues “My vagina is supposed to smell like pussy!”

 

 

 

 

 

The Cuchini!
Just incase everyone thought you actually had vulva lips down there, now they’ll think you just look like barbie with a smooth hard crotch.